The Aftermath of Barbie's Breakup

I went over to Barbie's house to see how she was doing after the break-up between her and Ken.
I was floored. I figured she might be depressed, but this is ridiculous!

She was gorging herself on junk food, especially pizza.

Dirty plates and empty cups piled up along and under the couch.

She had not only her cell phone, but her home phone within arm's reach, just in case Ken called to get back together.

She hadn't brushed her hair in days. There were knots, tangles, and things stuck in there!

Her clothes were filthy, but at least she wasn't wearing pajamas, right?

Even with all the eating, she was losing weight. Even her chest was shrinking.

She kept the teddy bear Ken had won at the last state fair close.

She'd been staring at the tv for days. Zoning out watching the Lifetime channel.

She's gonna flip out when she hears about their sex tape; Ken spread it all over the internet.