Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Itchy Eyes - Open letter

Dear Scientists,

It's the year 2010, have you noticed? I don't want to sound ungrateful, like those whiny bitches who want a jet pack, but I'd like an explanation. Why hasn't an allergy medication been invented that works?! One that stopping the urge to scratch my eyeballs out, just because the grass is turning green. One that doesn't leave me so doped up that I forget it's not Monday, it's Tuesday and I've forgotten to pick up my mother at the hospital. Mankind has been patient for this kind of change. And I think we're ready and responsible enough to handle the kind of power that being allergy free would give us.

Please?
Suicidal Jane

P.S. If you could also get to work on chocolate that makes women lose weight, I'd be forever grateful.

1 comment:

Nettie said...

That's what happened! I did figure you'd gotten the days mixed up.