I'm going for a world record!

Everyone with writer's block knows how easy it is to claim that you're too busy to write. Work is taking up all of your time. You're training for a marathon. You're focusing all of your energy on constructing an exact replica of Seth Green's character's apartment from the television show "Greg the Bunny". Life happens, and it's easier to make excuses, rather than write. Lazy is comfortable, yet uncomfortable.

So what's my excuse?

I have fallen in love with a bathtub. It's big enough for two people (not that I'm willing to share), and as soon as I can figure out how to stretch my vaginal walls enough, I'm going to make love to it. All of it.