Don't joke about cat thongs (The moral of this story.)

Mr J and I may have just had our stupidest fight ever. I jokingly accused him of buying the cats' underwear. I don't recall what lead up to that. But he laughed. I laughed. So I continued to up the ante. He had spent $150 dollars at a specialty cat lingerie store online, on cat thongs. I laughed. He didn't.

"You sent $150 dollars online buying lingerie?!" All traces of a smile had left Mr J's face.

"No, you did. Last Tuesday. On cat thongs. I think you were drunk." I assumed he was playing a game.

"I can't believe you would do that without telling me first. We have bills, you know." Mr J, still wasn't smiling.

"I know! You really should have asked the cats. I doubt they'll even wear them." I still hadn't caught on that his face was getting tense.

He didn't respond. He looked down at his food and began eating. Each stab of the fork was deliberate, and loud.

That's when I noticed the veins bulging and throbbing from his forehead. "Dude. What's your problem?!"

"Nothing." He kept eating.

"Seriously. What's the deal? We were just having a good time. What did I say?"

"You just spent $150 on underwear. We're barely getting by financially, and you're frivolously spending." He was serious.

"What are you talking about? I didn't buy any underwear. That was a joke. About you buying cat thongs."

"Fine." He went back to eating. The vein was still pulsing.

"What now?!"

"I just thought that was your way of admitting that you'd done that."

"So you're mad, because you've imagined me spending imaginary money on imaginary underwear." I could not believe how insane this had become.

"It sounds stupid when you say it like that..."

And now I'm mad at him! I seriously hate it when men get their periods and act so fucking hormonal.


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